School or no school?
It can sometimes seem as though that is the only choice. You're either in this camp or that one.
At first glance it's easy to think that these are the only two options. Certainly in the minds of most of us they are.
But the truth is, there are other choices. They may be a little more difficult to find at first, but they are popping up all over the world and I find it very exciting.
Options like Flexi-School, Free School, Part-Time School, Learning Co-ops, tertiary institutions offering high school studies, online courses, Distance Education.
Choices! Hoorah!
Even though I may sound it at times, I am not Anti-Schooling. I am Pro-Education and Pro-Choice. There are some amazing schools out there doing amazing things. Full-time home education doesn't suit all families and although I would like to see more children being educated in a way that doesn't involve traditional schools, I know there will always be a need for schools.
Many families don't feel that sending their children to school 6 hours a day, 5 days a week for 13 years is beneficial. At the same time they don't want, or cannot, have their children by their side 24 hours a day.
I would love to see a balance become available for these families, go to school two days a week, stay home three. Study certain subjects at school and the rest at home. It would certainly be beneficial for the home educated children, to have access to the resources that schools can provide such as rugby fields, experienced teachers, music rooms and science labs.
And beneficial for the schooling families too! They may decide to have their children at home for a limited time, for reasons of illness or travel or distance, and then the home educating families would be a tremendous source of knowledge and support for them.
However this option is still only very limited, especially for younger children. And not allowed in some Australian states and territories at all.
It seems the attitude is all or nothing. Why is flexibility not more of an option? We're not enemies are we? We want the same things - the best possible educational experience for our children.
We both have value, we both have something to offer.
Moving toward a respectful partnership with flexibility, support and compassion will be beneficial to all involved, especially our kids.
I hope this blog helps to challenge the preconceived notions regarding the Home Education/Traditional Schooling divide. At the very least it helps get this ongoing mental debate out of my head. Is anyone listening anyway?
Sunday, 29 May 2011
Wednesday, 25 May 2011
Toys, Toys and More Toys!
Have you ever heard the expression, 'You don't know what you have till you put it in a box"?
Well, as I am presently putting what we have in many boxes, I now know. We have toys, toys and more toys!
How did we end up with so many toys?
There are so many amazing toys on the market now that parents feel the need to buy more and more, cluttering up the room (and minds) of there little ones. Myself included!
Why do I do this? I know the best toys are things like a cardboard box, a long piece of string or a variety of pots and pans. I have watched in dismay many times, having bought the calves some new and expensive toy, seeing them lose interest after only a few minutes.
Perhaps I am seduced by the captions on the box. Things like "discover the world of insects" and "build phonemic awareness", "Ooohhh!" I say "Phonemic awareness", sounds like something we need.
But the thing is, many toys are limiting in the way you can play with them. Limiting to the extraordinary capabilities of a child's imagination that is.
Go back to the long piece of string, it could be anything, couldn't it? A snake, a tower, a rope or barrier. You can tie with it, you can run with it, thread with it, wrap it around things, jump over it and limbo under it. You can take it in the bath and see if it floats. The possibilities are endless and it costs next to nothing.
It's what's inside the child that counts not the stuff we surround them with.
A friend recently told me of a kindergarten in Tokyo that has no toys. No toys! Can you imagine such a place? How would you feel if you walked into a kindergarten that had no toys? Would you consider sending your kids there?
The only toys the kids have there are the ones they make themselves.
I imagine a large, almost empty space where the children have access to all manner of materials and tools. Where they communicate, collaborate and create! Wow! Not only do I want to work there, I want to play there!
Maybe by giving kids too many options regarding materials and toys for play we are actually stifling the creative experience? To achieve a desired end given limited resource takes imagination and creativity. Definitely skills needed for the future we find ourselves facing wouldn't you say?
So, we are selling, donating and throwing away a lot of stuff and have sworn a pledge not to repeat the same mistakes. Here's to a clutter-free existence!
Well, as I am presently putting what we have in many boxes, I now know. We have toys, toys and more toys!
How did we end up with so many toys?
There are so many amazing toys on the market now that parents feel the need to buy more and more, cluttering up the room (and minds) of there little ones. Myself included!
Why do I do this? I know the best toys are things like a cardboard box, a long piece of string or a variety of pots and pans. I have watched in dismay many times, having bought the calves some new and expensive toy, seeing them lose interest after only a few minutes.
Perhaps I am seduced by the captions on the box. Things like "discover the world of insects" and "build phonemic awareness", "Ooohhh!" I say "Phonemic awareness", sounds like something we need.
But the thing is, many toys are limiting in the way you can play with them. Limiting to the extraordinary capabilities of a child's imagination that is.
Go back to the long piece of string, it could be anything, couldn't it? A snake, a tower, a rope or barrier. You can tie with it, you can run with it, thread with it, wrap it around things, jump over it and limbo under it. You can take it in the bath and see if it floats. The possibilities are endless and it costs next to nothing.
It's what's inside the child that counts not the stuff we surround them with.
A friend recently told me of a kindergarten in Tokyo that has no toys. No toys! Can you imagine such a place? How would you feel if you walked into a kindergarten that had no toys? Would you consider sending your kids there?
The only toys the kids have there are the ones they make themselves.
I imagine a large, almost empty space where the children have access to all manner of materials and tools. Where they communicate, collaborate and create! Wow! Not only do I want to work there, I want to play there!
Maybe by giving kids too many options regarding materials and toys for play we are actually stifling the creative experience? To achieve a desired end given limited resource takes imagination and creativity. Definitely skills needed for the future we find ourselves facing wouldn't you say?
So, we are selling, donating and throwing away a lot of stuff and have sworn a pledge not to repeat the same mistakes. Here's to a clutter-free existence!
Thursday, 19 May 2011
Learning for Real
Yesterday I attempted coaxing the elder calf into writing. I haven't seen you write much for a few days I said, come and sit here and do some of this writing/phonics book with me (old habits die hard), smiling in a way I hope conveyed how exciting it was going to be.
She gave me a weak, half smile and sat at the table to begin her 'work'. After glancing at a page or two she suddenly declares she has been struck down with a tummy ache and went to lay on her bed. A short while later (feeling genuine concern for her well-being...) I went in to see how she was to find her happily playing lego on the bed with her sister.
Shortly after this, the calves bounded out to me having remembered that we are planning a yard sale for this weekend and needed to prepare. After a little discussion about what was needed, they were sitting and writing advertising posters for the sale. We talked about what we wanted to say and how to write in a way that would grab the attention of passers by. She asked about spelling words she didn't know and guessed at the spelling of others and did pretty well too.
Here they were, writing, talking about writing and it's purpose, talking about letters and sounds, spelling. This is what I had tried to get her to do not an hour before without success!
What's the difference? Purpose! A real purpose!
When you remove learning from it's purpose, you remove it from the motivation to learn it.
How many times have you heard children ask, "But WHY do I need to learn this?" I can remember asking exactly that, in high school, many times, and I think it is a very good question. And one we should answer.
Why do I need to know this specific information, today? Will it enable me to build or create something new? Will it enable me to grow morally, ethically, spiritually?
If I can't remember the date the Cretaceous began and the Jurassic ended, will I still succeed in life? And what if I can remember it? Does that mean that I am of a higher level of intelligence than the kid sitting next to me who can't?
Because I will be tested on it, is not a motivation to a child.
We have segmented and separated knowledge to such a degree that children don't know why they are learning or how it relates to the knowledge they already have. They don't see what they can do with the new knowledge. It is totally removed from the bigger picture, from life.
I hear my friends talk about getting their children to do their homework. I hear them complain about why, having spent 6 hours at school, they still have another hour of work at home. And how they find it difficult to help because they don't know what the children are learning. You know what, for the most part, the children don't know either.
For most people in the western world, knowledge is at our fingertips. I can go online, right now and find out any new information I need. And so can my kids.
I wanted to char grille capsicum the other day, so like most people, I watched a video on YouTube first on how to do it. I read a cooking forum with a load of comments by people from all around the world who have chargrilled capsicum before. And then I did it.
This is the world our children are living in, now. Given the crises we find ourselves in, one can only guess at what it will be like for them in twenty years. Perhaps in the future, what they will need is creativity, courage, morality, confidence, communication and collaboration skills, and the ability to think critically about what they experience.
Can these things be taught through curriculum? Through the chopping up of knowledge and experience? Or are they taught by living. Living alongside our friends, families, peers and communities. Being involved in real activities, with real tools, alongside real people, for real purposes.
She gave me a weak, half smile and sat at the table to begin her 'work'. After glancing at a page or two she suddenly declares she has been struck down with a tummy ache and went to lay on her bed. A short while later (feeling genuine concern for her well-being...) I went in to see how she was to find her happily playing lego on the bed with her sister.
Shortly after this, the calves bounded out to me having remembered that we are planning a yard sale for this weekend and needed to prepare. After a little discussion about what was needed, they were sitting and writing advertising posters for the sale. We talked about what we wanted to say and how to write in a way that would grab the attention of passers by. She asked about spelling words she didn't know and guessed at the spelling of others and did pretty well too.
Here they were, writing, talking about writing and it's purpose, talking about letters and sounds, spelling. This is what I had tried to get her to do not an hour before without success!
What's the difference? Purpose! A real purpose!
When you remove learning from it's purpose, you remove it from the motivation to learn it.
Why do I need to know this specific information, today? Will it enable me to build or create something new? Will it enable me to grow morally, ethically, spiritually?
If I can't remember the date the Cretaceous began and the Jurassic ended, will I still succeed in life? And what if I can remember it? Does that mean that I am of a higher level of intelligence than the kid sitting next to me who can't?
Because I will be tested on it, is not a motivation to a child.
We have segmented and separated knowledge to such a degree that children don't know why they are learning or how it relates to the knowledge they already have. They don't see what they can do with the new knowledge. It is totally removed from the bigger picture, from life.
I hear my friends talk about getting their children to do their homework. I hear them complain about why, having spent 6 hours at school, they still have another hour of work at home. And how they find it difficult to help because they don't know what the children are learning. You know what, for the most part, the children don't know either.
For most people in the western world, knowledge is at our fingertips. I can go online, right now and find out any new information I need. And so can my kids.
I wanted to char grille capsicum the other day, so like most people, I watched a video on YouTube first on how to do it. I read a cooking forum with a load of comments by people from all around the world who have chargrilled capsicum before. And then I did it.
This is the world our children are living in, now. Given the crises we find ourselves in, one can only guess at what it will be like for them in twenty years. Perhaps in the future, what they will need is creativity, courage, morality, confidence, communication and collaboration skills, and the ability to think critically about what they experience.
Can these things be taught through curriculum? Through the chopping up of knowledge and experience? Or are they taught by living. Living alongside our friends, families, peers and communities. Being involved in real activities, with real tools, alongside real people, for real purposes.
Tuesday, 17 May 2011
A Bag of Bibs and Bobs
Yesterday, the Calves and I spent the day wandering around Sham Shui Po textile market with friends. What an incredible place! Staring in wonderment at the endless array of beads, buttons, fabrics, feathers, glitter, sequins and all else, sets the mind racing and the creative juices flowing.
For a little girl with some money in her pocket, there is nothing more exciting!
We decided to make the very serious purchase of a 10 dollar bag of assorted plastic pendants. Having been dragged home with all the anticipation of the wondrous play ahead, they were left on the table for the more pressing need of sleep.
But, come 7am this morning, the bags were ripped open and the exploration began. So far (it is now shortly after 9) they have been made into soup and witch's spells, they have been sorted and classified into groups and lines, they have been shoved into a variety of containers and bowls and juggled around. They have had their spinning and sliding capabilities investigated, tested and compared. And now they are in the sink being washed or "bathed" in soapy water.
What a math lesson is that! Investigations in shape, colour, size, line and contour. Comparing speed and capacity. Testing, hypothesizing and retesting. Grouping, sorting and organising.
The list goes on, and don't even get me started on Art, Imagination or Creativity!
Friday, 13 May 2011
Paying Homage to Po Po
Po Po in Cantonese means Grandmother. But it's more than that. Using it is a sign of respect, respect for family, respect for authority.
The calves have learned to greet the multitude of elderly ladies in our village with a "Jo san, Po Po" or "Lei Ho, Po Po", depending on the time of day, to say good morning in a respectful way.
The Po Pos invariably descend into praise of the 'beautiful girl' or 'clever girl' type and the calves beam back their proud smiles.
I have come to love these daily interactions. They are simple, heartwarming and honest. One of the things I will miss most about Hong Kong are the Po Pos.
Working with and living among a society so different from your own can prove frustrating at times. In a professional environment you are required to be patient, understanding and accepting of others viewpoints, even when they are in total conflict with your own. I'm not saying this isn't a good thing, it is, but it's tiring, day after day.
The Po Pos, the calves and I have a relationship that requires none of that. They come from a totally Chinese perspective and we come from a totally Gweilo (foreign devil) perspective.
And yet we know each other well.
They see me, pushing the groceries up the hill with the two calves, covered in sweat, during the unbelievable Hong Kong summer heat and give me a knowing smile. They see us playing outside. They see us happy, exhausted, frustrated, angry, excited. They may have even seen tears once or twice.
And I have seen them too, early in the morning tending their farms, playing with their grandchildren, shouting at their husbands. We have a silent friendship, save a few words here or there, that has come to mean a lot to me.
There is something special about this simple, daily, human connection that transcends age, culture, location, religion, you name it. There is an understanding there and an acceptance because we both know it will never be more than what it is right now.
So, thank you Po Po for the smiles of encouragement, for being so warm and loving to children, for not laughing at my poor attempts at tone-deaf Cantonese and for living peacefully beside me for the past five years.
I have always found something particularly wonderful about Grandmothers and the Chinese Po Pos are no exception.
The calves have learned to greet the multitude of elderly ladies in our village with a "Jo san, Po Po" or "Lei Ho, Po Po", depending on the time of day, to say good morning in a respectful way.
The Po Pos invariably descend into praise of the 'beautiful girl' or 'clever girl' type and the calves beam back their proud smiles.
I have come to love these daily interactions. They are simple, heartwarming and honest. One of the things I will miss most about Hong Kong are the Po Pos.
Working with and living among a society so different from your own can prove frustrating at times. In a professional environment you are required to be patient, understanding and accepting of others viewpoints, even when they are in total conflict with your own. I'm not saying this isn't a good thing, it is, but it's tiring, day after day.
The Po Pos, the calves and I have a relationship that requires none of that. They come from a totally Chinese perspective and we come from a totally Gweilo (foreign devil) perspective.
And yet we know each other well.
They see me, pushing the groceries up the hill with the two calves, covered in sweat, during the unbelievable Hong Kong summer heat and give me a knowing smile. They see us playing outside. They see us happy, exhausted, frustrated, angry, excited. They may have even seen tears once or twice.
And I have seen them too, early in the morning tending their farms, playing with their grandchildren, shouting at their husbands. We have a silent friendship, save a few words here or there, that has come to mean a lot to me.
There is something special about this simple, daily, human connection that transcends age, culture, location, religion, you name it. There is an understanding there and an acceptance because we both know it will never be more than what it is right now.
So, thank you Po Po for the smiles of encouragement, for being so warm and loving to children, for not laughing at my poor attempts at tone-deaf Cantonese and for living peacefully beside me for the past five years.
I have always found something particularly wonderful about Grandmothers and the Chinese Po Pos are no exception.
Wednesday, 11 May 2011
Home? Where is that?
We are heading home. After nearly 8 years of traveling!
It took my English/Australian family a long while to decide where home would be for the next few years. I consider us pretty lucky that this is one of our biggest problems, England, Australia, England, Australia. Both beautiful countries with a lot to offer.
Lots of my expat friends say they don't know where home is. Home is in so many places for them that living within an expat community, somewhere, is what feels like home. I get that. Not so for me though, I spent the first 22 years of my life in Sydney. Sydney is my home and always will be. It was as an adult that I have travelled.
I was fortunate enough to be part of a discussion and talk on Third Culture Kids given at an AIE (Alliance for International Education) Conference in Shanghai a few years ago.
The term 'TCK' refers to a child who has lived abroad for a part of their childhood and then returns home, to her parent's home country or the country of her passport to live.
Their third culture is created by mixing their parent/passport culture with the culture of where they have lived. In the calves case, Australian/English/Chinese.
One of the main points of this discussion was the emotions children go through and the difficulties they may face when they first arrive. The idea rests on the premise that local children will have had a different experience to the returning children, they will have a different set of popular culture and will perhaps not understand the experiences the new children have had.
I'm not sure how this works for Home-Educated children, but I will keep you posted.
The calves have travelled frequently to their home countries and have a pretty good idea about what life there is like. Today, so many families with children travel and spend time abroad, that I wonder if the idea of the local children having had 'different' or even 'limited' experience really applies.
I am talking a lot to the kids about 'the big move' and so far they seem excited. Mostly to be nearer their grandparents.
I have loved the experience of living and working abroad, it has challenged me EVERY DAY and I have grown a great deal, I hope.
Maybe due to the fact that I have such a strong connection to my home, I am now feeling the importance of giving the calves that. I value travel, I hope they will do a lot of it, but I want them to have a place to call home. Only time will tell where that is for them.
Perhaps, hopefully, it will be wherever their father and I are - and who knows where that will be!
.......Off to daydream about that for a while.
It took my English/Australian family a long while to decide where home would be for the next few years. I consider us pretty lucky that this is one of our biggest problems, England, Australia, England, Australia. Both beautiful countries with a lot to offer.
Lots of my expat friends say they don't know where home is. Home is in so many places for them that living within an expat community, somewhere, is what feels like home. I get that. Not so for me though, I spent the first 22 years of my life in Sydney. Sydney is my home and always will be. It was as an adult that I have travelled.
I was fortunate enough to be part of a discussion and talk on Third Culture Kids given at an AIE (Alliance for International Education) Conference in Shanghai a few years ago.
The term 'TCK' refers to a child who has lived abroad for a part of their childhood and then returns home, to her parent's home country or the country of her passport to live.
Their third culture is created by mixing their parent/passport culture with the culture of where they have lived. In the calves case, Australian/English/Chinese.
One of the main points of this discussion was the emotions children go through and the difficulties they may face when they first arrive. The idea rests on the premise that local children will have had a different experience to the returning children, they will have a different set of popular culture and will perhaps not understand the experiences the new children have had.
I'm not sure how this works for Home-Educated children, but I will keep you posted.
The calves have travelled frequently to their home countries and have a pretty good idea about what life there is like. Today, so many families with children travel and spend time abroad, that I wonder if the idea of the local children having had 'different' or even 'limited' experience really applies.
I am talking a lot to the kids about 'the big move' and so far they seem excited. Mostly to be nearer their grandparents.
I have loved the experience of living and working abroad, it has challenged me EVERY DAY and I have grown a great deal, I hope.
Maybe due to the fact that I have such a strong connection to my home, I am now feeling the importance of giving the calves that. I value travel, I hope they will do a lot of it, but I want them to have a place to call home. Only time will tell where that is for them.
Perhaps, hopefully, it will be wherever their father and I are - and who knows where that will be!
.......Off to daydream about that for a while.
Monday, 9 May 2011
A Leap of Faith
At some point, jumping into the unknown requires a leap of faith. For people who are new to the idea of an Alternative Education, that’s exactly what it entails, jumping into the vast and scary unknown. Often to the surprise and maybe even ridicule of the people closest to you.
For me the leap of faith required here is possibly the most difficult you could make of your life. Because with Home Education you are not putting your faith in some all-powerful, mystical being in the clouds, you are putting your faith in you.
Me? I hear you say. Me? Hopelessly flawed, irresponsible at times, scared. There is no one to pass the buck to if I foul up. It’s just me, taking on this HUGE responsibility.
Personally, I took two leaps of faith. Is that possible? Are you allowed to take two leaps of faith?
One big, sudden, almost violent leap and one softer, quieter one?
For me, the first leap, the big one, was walking out of that interview, calf in hand, head held high, crumbling on the inside. Making the choice to take her out of one of the most expensive, highly regarded International Schools in Hong Kong.
The second leap, the softer one, came over a cup of coffee with my husband a while later when we together decided that we would pursue this Home Education thing, at least for now and see where it took us.
The stories involving the leaps of others have been many and varied. The Home Education journey begins in all kinds of interesting ways.
But it’s not just you. You will find your support networks. Your partner. Your friends and family. The well-seasoned, educated and experienced herd that has trodden the path before you.
It takes a whole community to raise a child. And the Alternative Education Community is a strong and supportive one.
Something you may not be expecting and the thing I hear all my fellow Home Educators shouting is the kids, the kids, what about the kids!
The kids lead the way, really they do. Once you’ve seen in action how empowering them with the direction and responsibility for their own learning sets them running at full speed, there is no looking back.
You’re just there to clean up after them, point them in the right direction and drive them places.
Sunday, 8 May 2011
OK, Let's talk about Socialisation......again!
OK, it's come up again..Socialisation. How can children possibly make friends, play sports, go to dances, be in plays and performances if they don't go to school?
I sit here and I think about what Socialisation is. There are a variety of definitions but basically Socialisation is the process a person goes through that enables him/her to function in the society of which they are a part. When talking about Socialisation in regards to Home Education, it seems to focus mostly on the ability to form and maintain friendships.
Despite the reams of research that suggest the opposite, it seems that some people view home educated children as unsocialised, without friends, lacking confidence. That is not my experience. The home educating families I know are outgoing, happy, friendly and welcoming. You can only speak from your own experience.
The Calves and I are always out and about. We have many friends. Perhaps the word 'home' in Home Education suggests images of children locked up at home, completing worksheets and going pale from lack of sun? I assure you that is not the case in our home, nor in the homes of the vast majority of my fellow home educators. The word 'home' in this context suggests to me warmth, compassion, love, a slower pace, perhaps a few rough edges. Like home made bread or a home made chair. Slightly to the side of 'normal', a little wonky perhaps but oh, so much better!
For the record, we play with the local children in our village almost daily at the playground. The calves have no problem interacting with other children and making friends. We attend most visiting exhibitions at the local museums and art galleries. We go to the beach, out for lunch, we go for hikes and long walks around the farms in our village to observe nature. We do Taekwondo, we go to the botanical gardens, the markets, the zoo. The list is endless really, we do all the things that most families with young kids do we just have more time to do it.
As an adult I have lived and worked in three countries. I have had to communicate and cooperate with a great variety of people personally and professionally. School didn't prepare me for that, life did. When, as an adult, are you ever again in a room with 25 other people the same age and from the same background as you?
My kids travel extensively and have met and made friends with people from all over the world. I am not saying you can't do that WITH school I am just denying the assumption that you NEED school in order to do it.
This blog is less about what school isn't and more about what Home Education is. Home Education is not for everyone and I don't think it should be. It's about options, choices for families and acceptance. I am writing here not in defense of my choices or my rights as a parent but to be a part of the discussion about alternative ways of educating children that has been going on for a long time. The reality is that more and more families all over the world are choosing Home Education and alternative schooling arrangements for their kids.
To the mums and dads I chat with who are searching for a new fit for their family but feel scared to step off the well-trodden path, this blog's for you. Hopefully you will see, if I, a Wild Cow living on an island in Hong Kong can do it, so can you.
I sit here and I think about what Socialisation is. There are a variety of definitions but basically Socialisation is the process a person goes through that enables him/her to function in the society of which they are a part. When talking about Socialisation in regards to Home Education, it seems to focus mostly on the ability to form and maintain friendships.
Despite the reams of research that suggest the opposite, it seems that some people view home educated children as unsocialised, without friends, lacking confidence. That is not my experience. The home educating families I know are outgoing, happy, friendly and welcoming. You can only speak from your own experience.
The Calves and I are always out and about. We have many friends. Perhaps the word 'home' in Home Education suggests images of children locked up at home, completing worksheets and going pale from lack of sun? I assure you that is not the case in our home, nor in the homes of the vast majority of my fellow home educators. The word 'home' in this context suggests to me warmth, compassion, love, a slower pace, perhaps a few rough edges. Like home made bread or a home made chair. Slightly to the side of 'normal', a little wonky perhaps but oh, so much better!
For the record, we play with the local children in our village almost daily at the playground. The calves have no problem interacting with other children and making friends. We attend most visiting exhibitions at the local museums and art galleries. We go to the beach, out for lunch, we go for hikes and long walks around the farms in our village to observe nature. We do Taekwondo, we go to the botanical gardens, the markets, the zoo. The list is endless really, we do all the things that most families with young kids do we just have more time to do it.
As an adult I have lived and worked in three countries. I have had to communicate and cooperate with a great variety of people personally and professionally. School didn't prepare me for that, life did. When, as an adult, are you ever again in a room with 25 other people the same age and from the same background as you?
My kids travel extensively and have met and made friends with people from all over the world. I am not saying you can't do that WITH school I am just denying the assumption that you NEED school in order to do it.
This blog is less about what school isn't and more about what Home Education is. Home Education is not for everyone and I don't think it should be. It's about options, choices for families and acceptance. I am writing here not in defense of my choices or my rights as a parent but to be a part of the discussion about alternative ways of educating children that has been going on for a long time. The reality is that more and more families all over the world are choosing Home Education and alternative schooling arrangements for their kids.
To the mums and dads I chat with who are searching for a new fit for their family but feel scared to step off the well-trodden path, this blog's for you. Hopefully you will see, if I, a Wild Cow living on an island in Hong Kong can do it, so can you.
Oh, But you're a teacher...
Playing in the playground today and chatting with another mum the question of school came up, as it invariably does. The usual replies to finding out we Home Educate include "Oh....really?" or "I could never do that, my kids don't listen to me" or (my personal favourite) of stunned silence followed by "So... you know...what do you DO during the day?"
Although it does get a bit old, hearing these kind of responses day after day, I don't really mind. It's natural for people to question something they have not experienced before.
Trying to see it as an opportunity to expand someone's ideas regarding Alternative Education, I usually answer honestly about our personal experiences. Usually... But not always!
Somedays I truly can't be bothered to explain my parenting choices to a complete stranger. Somedays I fight off the barrage of insinuating questions by equally questioning their decision to school. And somedays I just lie and say she's in K3.
A lot of the time, these conversations seem to continue even though I'm doing my personal best to avoid them. Being chased around the playground by a curious mum or two is not a one off event.
Why the intense interest? Do they know something's up? Are they looking for answers too?
When conversations about Education do continue, it eventually comes up that I'm a teacher. Then some mystical penny drops, their faces light up and they say "Oh...NOW I understand", looking incredibly relieved.
Honestly, being a teacher helps, a little, in the beginning. Like my experience as an electrician would help when I decide to rewire my house. But it isn't essential, the knowledge is out there for anyone who wants to find it. Sometimes I wonder if it's even beneficial. There is so much training, so many preconceived ideas that need to be let go of in order to teach your own.
We are all teachers. Even my two year old has the ability to teach. If you have experienced something that someone else hasn't, you share the knowledge, then stand back and let them get on with the serious business of learning it. The less input the better. It's about support not control.
We've all heard that parents are the number one teachers of their children and it's true. Why should it stop at 2 or 3 or 5 or ever? The unconditional love and support a child gets at home is the perfect place to grow and learn. Where it's safe to make mistakes or say something silly and just be yourself. School does not, could not, ever replace that. Nor can any teacher.
So, I say to those mums chasing me around the playground, stop thinking about what a teacher can give your child that you can't and start thinking about what you can give your child that a teacher can't. No one is more invested in your child's success than you.
Although it does get a bit old, hearing these kind of responses day after day, I don't really mind. It's natural for people to question something they have not experienced before.
Trying to see it as an opportunity to expand someone's ideas regarding Alternative Education, I usually answer honestly about our personal experiences. Usually... But not always!
Somedays I truly can't be bothered to explain my parenting choices to a complete stranger. Somedays I fight off the barrage of insinuating questions by equally questioning their decision to school. And somedays I just lie and say she's in K3.
A lot of the time, these conversations seem to continue even though I'm doing my personal best to avoid them. Being chased around the playground by a curious mum or two is not a one off event.
Why the intense interest? Do they know something's up? Are they looking for answers too?
When conversations about Education do continue, it eventually comes up that I'm a teacher. Then some mystical penny drops, their faces light up and they say "Oh...NOW I understand", looking incredibly relieved.
Honestly, being a teacher helps, a little, in the beginning. Like my experience as an electrician would help when I decide to rewire my house. But it isn't essential, the knowledge is out there for anyone who wants to find it. Sometimes I wonder if it's even beneficial. There is so much training, so many preconceived ideas that need to be let go of in order to teach your own.
We are all teachers. Even my two year old has the ability to teach. If you have experienced something that someone else hasn't, you share the knowledge, then stand back and let them get on with the serious business of learning it. The less input the better. It's about support not control.
We've all heard that parents are the number one teachers of their children and it's true. Why should it stop at 2 or 3 or 5 or ever? The unconditional love and support a child gets at home is the perfect place to grow and learn. Where it's safe to make mistakes or say something silly and just be yourself. School does not, could not, ever replace that. Nor can any teacher.
So, I say to those mums chasing me around the playground, stop thinking about what a teacher can give your child that you can't and start thinking about what you can give your child that a teacher can't. No one is more invested in your child's success than you.
Saturday, 7 May 2011
It's not her, It's them.
I never thought I would home educate. I went to school. Everyone I knew went to school.
I spent four and a half years at university training to be a teacher. I believe in Education. I never questioned the importance of going to school. I, like most people, took it for granted that that is what you did when you were a kid - you went to school. You hated it, but you went, it's just the way it is, right?
I'd heard of home education and thought it was something people do in some far away place for reasons that had nothing to do with me.
All that changed a year and a half ago when my husband and I decided to take our eldest daughter out of school for good.
We didn't really know where we were going, but we knew what we were leaving.
I was tired of telling my then four year old to hurry up. Hurry up and eat breakfast, hurry up and get ready for school, hurry, don't miss the bus, hurry up finish dinner so she could do her homework, get to bed and get enough sleep for the mammoth day of rushing ahead of her tomorrow.
Anyone who was a young child knows, that children and the word 'hurry' don't mix, no matter how loudly you shout it.
What was happening to my family? We had little time to play or communicate or just be together. Her baby sister was generally in bed shortly after she got home so their relationship was left till the weekends, as though unimportant, a side event to the main show - school.
How can this be what's best for our family? For the girls? Leading separate lives? Already?
With a head full of doubt I went to our first 'parent-teacher consultation' and came out distraught. I was told my four year old was 'struggling' because she was unable to sit on a mat for thirty minutes to listen to a foreign language she didn't understand. When did that become something that we expected from four year olds? When did that become something we expected from anyone?
After the meeting we were playing in the park and I looked at my daughter, closely, I watched her, perhaps in a way I hadn't before. All I could see was a beautiful, intelligent, vivacious, spirited little girl, excited by life and what she could do.
And then I knew, it wasn't her, it was them.
Now, a year and a half later, we have achieved something great. We've said no to school. We've made some friends, read some books, made some mistakes and learned a whole new way of looking at life. Of looking at growing and learning and living, together as a family, without school.
Even here in Hong Kong, in the midst of a concrete jungle and a society that values schooling, schooling and more schooling there are kids wandering about during the day taking time to look at things, to ask questions and have great conversations, thankfully mine are among them.
I spent four and a half years at university training to be a teacher. I believe in Education. I never questioned the importance of going to school. I, like most people, took it for granted that that is what you did when you were a kid - you went to school. You hated it, but you went, it's just the way it is, right?
I'd heard of home education and thought it was something people do in some far away place for reasons that had nothing to do with me.
All that changed a year and a half ago when my husband and I decided to take our eldest daughter out of school for good.
We didn't really know where we were going, but we knew what we were leaving.
I was tired of telling my then four year old to hurry up. Hurry up and eat breakfast, hurry up and get ready for school, hurry, don't miss the bus, hurry up finish dinner so she could do her homework, get to bed and get enough sleep for the mammoth day of rushing ahead of her tomorrow.
Anyone who was a young child knows, that children and the word 'hurry' don't mix, no matter how loudly you shout it.
What was happening to my family? We had little time to play or communicate or just be together. Her baby sister was generally in bed shortly after she got home so their relationship was left till the weekends, as though unimportant, a side event to the main show - school.
How can this be what's best for our family? For the girls? Leading separate lives? Already?
With a head full of doubt I went to our first 'parent-teacher consultation' and came out distraught. I was told my four year old was 'struggling' because she was unable to sit on a mat for thirty minutes to listen to a foreign language she didn't understand. When did that become something that we expected from four year olds? When did that become something we expected from anyone?
After the meeting we were playing in the park and I looked at my daughter, closely, I watched her, perhaps in a way I hadn't before. All I could see was a beautiful, intelligent, vivacious, spirited little girl, excited by life and what she could do.
And then I knew, it wasn't her, it was them.
Now, a year and a half later, we have achieved something great. We've said no to school. We've made some friends, read some books, made some mistakes and learned a whole new way of looking at life. Of looking at growing and learning and living, together as a family, without school.
Even here in Hong Kong, in the midst of a concrete jungle and a society that values schooling, schooling and more schooling there are kids wandering about during the day taking time to look at things, to ask questions and have great conversations, thankfully mine are among them.
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